Dr Holmes brought me to a nursing home last Tuesday. I've never been to one before, but to be frank, I always had an ugly picture of it in my mind. And mind you, now that i've been there and witnessed it with my very own eyes, i am afraid i have to say the ugly picture that i had in my mind is true after all. It is an ugly place to live in. Not ugly, as in figuratively ugly. Huhu. But literally speaking, i would never want my parents to ended up there one day. If i live long enough, this is a vow that i am going to make to myself.
I found the visit quite depressing. To start with, the first patient that i saw just passed away. 20 minutes ago, she was talking, breathing and fine. The next 2o minutes, she was pale and stone cold. She was gone. Just like that.
The only thing that popped up in my mind back then was fear. Not that i fear of dead bodies (I was left alone with her body for a few minutes while the doctor and nurse ran out of the room to get gloves. uhuh)
I fear of death. Knowing that the clock is ticking, but the good deeds that i have done is too little if compared to my mountain-high sins.
Nothing is guaranteed in this life.
You are not guaranteed to have a successful life.
You are not guaranteed to have a blissful wedded life.
You are not guaranteed to have a continuous prosperous health and wealth.
Heck, you are not even guaranteed the next breath!
If He wants to take it from you, then He will take it from you. Cry all you want. Run as fast as you can. Fight as hard as you like. But if He wants to make things happen, then He will make things happen. Kun Fayakun..
Anyway, regarding the nursing home..
Obviously, the residence of the nursing home are the elderly. Old and crippled. Left all alone to die in the nursing home.
My heart was ripped even just to see them.
Everyone was sitting in the living room. The television is on, but nobody seems to care with what's going on with the world anymore. Why would anyone care who's going out with who or whats hot on movies right now or whatnot. Nobody seems to be interested to talk. Everyone just slumped in the huge armchair and stared out of the window. Silence. Pure silence. You could drop a bomb in the centre of the room, but i doubt a muscle will even twitch. The emptiness look in their face just strangled my emotion. I was choked by my own emotion..
Their bedrooms. Oh god. That even saddens me more. Some of them are too tired or too ill to move out of the bed, so they rested in their room instead. Their fragile body lie frailly on the bed, staring at the empty ceiling. Most of them, in fact, i think all of them, have pictures of their children and even grandchildren proudly standing on the bedside table. My aching heart flickered, 'Where are they? How can they live their mother or father to live all by his/herself in a nursing home?"
They are weak. Fragile. Half of their memory is gone. They can't eat as much. They can't talk as much. They can't even wash themselves! There's nothing much that they can do but to lie around. As if waiting for their time to come. And this just reminds me of this verse from Surah Yaasin.
" Dan sesiapa yang kami panjangkan umurnya, Kami kembalikan kepada asal kejadiannya (serba lemah) ; mengapa mereka tidak memikirkan?" Surah Yaasin: 68
I found the visit quite depressing. To start with, the first patient that i saw just passed away. 20 minutes ago, she was talking, breathing and fine. The next 2o minutes, she was pale and stone cold. She was gone. Just like that.
The only thing that popped up in my mind back then was fear. Not that i fear of dead bodies (I was left alone with her body for a few minutes while the doctor and nurse ran out of the room to get gloves. uhuh)
I fear of death. Knowing that the clock is ticking, but the good deeds that i have done is too little if compared to my mountain-high sins.
Nothing is guaranteed in this life.
You are not guaranteed to have a successful life.
You are not guaranteed to have a blissful wedded life.
You are not guaranteed to have a continuous prosperous health and wealth.
Heck, you are not even guaranteed the next breath!
If He wants to take it from you, then He will take it from you. Cry all you want. Run as fast as you can. Fight as hard as you like. But if He wants to make things happen, then He will make things happen. Kun Fayakun..
Anyway, regarding the nursing home..
Obviously, the residence of the nursing home are the elderly. Old and crippled. Left all alone to die in the nursing home.
My heart was ripped even just to see them.
Everyone was sitting in the living room. The television is on, but nobody seems to care with what's going on with the world anymore. Why would anyone care who's going out with who or whats hot on movies right now or whatnot. Nobody seems to be interested to talk. Everyone just slumped in the huge armchair and stared out of the window. Silence. Pure silence. You could drop a bomb in the centre of the room, but i doubt a muscle will even twitch. The emptiness look in their face just strangled my emotion. I was choked by my own emotion..
Their bedrooms. Oh god. That even saddens me more. Some of them are too tired or too ill to move out of the bed, so they rested in their room instead. Their fragile body lie frailly on the bed, staring at the empty ceiling. Most of them, in fact, i think all of them, have pictures of their children and even grandchildren proudly standing on the bedside table. My aching heart flickered, 'Where are they? How can they live their mother or father to live all by his/herself in a nursing home?"
They are weak. Fragile. Half of their memory is gone. They can't eat as much. They can't talk as much. They can't even wash themselves! There's nothing much that they can do but to lie around. As if waiting for their time to come. And this just reminds me of this verse from Surah Yaasin.
" Dan sesiapa yang kami panjangkan umurnya, Kami kembalikan kepada asal kejadiannya (serba lemah) ; mengapa mereka tidak memikirkan?" Surah Yaasin: 68
2 comments:
me... im scared to death of death! i feel the same way gurl
i know qieya. so let us do the best for now and the hereafter, insyaAllah ..
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