Mental Health Hotline

Got this joke about Mental Health Hotline from the staffs at Swallownest. You might not be able to appreciate the joke if you are non-medics. Huhu. Sorry for the discrimination. Hehe. Oh well, all of my posts have been related to medicine anyway. Copy and pasted this joke which i thought was quite funny (ie i did not write the jokes ok. nanti ada plak issue copyright. huhu) And by all means, i did not mean to make fun of those with mental health problems. huhu.

Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.

If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound button until a representative comes on the line.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, please press 9. If you have short term memory loss, please press 9. If you have short term memory loss, please press 9.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.