Raya di perantauan

I can't believe a year has past since we last had our raya together. Gosh, and now the holy month is about to come to its end. Syawal is approaching. I have a feeling that this coming Syawal will not be the same without you girls with me. Perhaps that explains the loop of emptiness that I am feeling inside. I miss you girls already...very much.


http://smsawomen.blogspot.com/2008_09_01_archive.html (click on the link for the video recorded from last year)

InsyaAllah, this is my fifth raya abroad. InsyaAllah, this is my fifth raya with me being away from my family. But why do I have a feeling that this raya will be the hardest for me? A 'rainy' raya, that is what I am expecting.

I miss everyone right now. My hormones seems to be taking its toll over me.

The unplanned trip

Brussels was OK. The whole trip was OK alhamdulillah, considering it was an unplanned trip. I know before this I whined about how costly the trip is, but now that I come to think of it, we actually had landed ourself on a very good bargain!

Our ticket includes a return trip to Brussels AND a 3 days 2 night accommodation in Brussels Hotel.

Eurostar is great! (Pardon me for being so jakun. It was my very first time travelling via Eurostar. hehe). Yes, we had to travel all the way to London for it. But, I personally think it was worthwhile. I don't have to care so much about what I can or can NOT put in my luggage (oh yes, the do scanyour bags, but i obviously do not carry a gun around, so that is ok for me.) I don't have to stress out about exceeding the luggage allowance. I can carry even up to 10 bags if I want to (which obviously I did not do because I don't have enough hands to carry 10 bags around!). The waiting time is much less reduced. The ambience in the train itself is very comforting. And most of all, I don't have to worry about crashing everything the train shooks. Huhu.



Our hotel is even better. It was right in front of the tram stop, which is extremely convenient. When we book the ticket, we ordered for a standard single room each (why we ordered separate room is a bit too complicated to be explained in this blog.) But alhamdulillah, instead of a single room, we got ourselves a double deluxe room which can fit up to 4 people in a room! The room itself costs even more than the total money that we had to spend for the whole package! Alhamdulillah. I guess Allah is just making things easy for us as we had to endure so much problem before we could even get to Brussels.

We did not do anything much on our first day. It was only on our second day our trip officially begun. We went to Atomium, Mini Europe, Grand Place and Maneken Piss (which really pissed me off.hehe) We break our fast in Grand Place, eating Belgium waffle. That was amazing. Hehe. All in all it was an-OK trip.

And alhamdulillah, Eza managed to get her 6 months visitors pass! Haha. So that makes our trip worth it.


Mek dah nak balik dah. Benci tul. Kirim salam kat orang kat rumah. Esp Ma n Pa. Cubitkan Qeefee and Damdam for me!

p/s: Now, should I restart counting? Hahha.

Salam wbt :)

Want to be a paramedic? Read this. Heheh

Today, I have spent the whole day with the paramedics. I had been looking forward to it ever since I've started this A&E rotation. I did not had the chance to follow the ambulance peeps during my A&E placement in Malaysia during my 6 weeks electives. So I was quite eager when I found out that Dr Stephenson had allocated each of us a day with the paramedics.

I was in from 10 am til around 6 ish. By the end of the shift, my head has gone all woozy. The ride in the ambulance is definitely NOT a pleasant ride.

If you want to be a paramedic, these are some key points that you need to know beforehand!

1. You have to be a skilled driver. You must be able to drive at high speed, selit selit in between cars, driving onto pavements and be extra alert whilst driving. With the speed you are driving, you are very much prone to have an accident!

2. If you are not the driver, you have to be able to NOT to vomit throughout the whole journey. It is one bumpy ride, I tell you. You must have a strong stomach to be a paramedic! (I could have vomited if I were not fasting! )

3. If the seats in the back are full, you must be able to stand throughout the ride without bumping your head onto the headboard or falling over and hurting yourself. There is already shortage of paramedics. Don't hurt yourself!

4. You must be able to cannulate or intubate or able to perform any other related practical procedure whilst standing. (Remember, it is an extremely bumpy ride!)

5. You must be able to do basic life support by yourself! Things get more tricky when it comes to chest compression. One hand has got to hold on to the rail for support, so that leaves you with only hand to do the chest compression. Which is ridiculously tiring!

Oh I could not think of anything else to write. I did have fun with the paramedics yesterday though. Chris was superb. He has been a paramedic for 20 years, so you can guess how many interesting stories he has to share! He is just brilliant!

So now I am halfway through my A&E rotation. And for this week, I will be doing the nights shift. From 4pm til midnight til Friday and 7pm til 3 am shift on Saturday. Wohoo. Obviously it is not wise for me to go back to Sheffield in the middle of the night, so I will be staying in the hospital's accommodation for this whole week til Sunday. I have almost finished packing my stuffs. Man, my bag is extremely heavy! Loaded with food food and food!! Brahim, serunding, sardine, milk and everything else. You just name it. Huhu.

Hope I enjoy my night shifts this week. At the same time, I hope it passes by quickly as well. Haha. I will miss my comfy bed.

p/s: Halfway through Ramadhan! Fast, ain't it? Ramadhan Mubarak peeps.

Salams :)

One of those days. Sigh.

I remember complaining to Jen about my humiliating incident with Dr Venkat in his GP surgery.

"I can't even answer at least one of his questions. My brain just goes blank. Then he asked me to summarize a patient's case which I did so horribly that I felt like crying," I said.

"Yeah. It's just one of those days, isn't it?" She replied.

Yes. It is definitely one of those days today. One of those days when you feel completely stupid. Not knowing anything. Not able to do anything right. It is just one of those days that makes you feel like burying your head in a hole, hoping that nobody will disturb you with anymore questions, praying for the day to end as fast as possible.

That is exactly what I felt this morning.

It was my last day for my 8am to 4pm shift today. I did feel quite nice, going back in to hospital after a day off yesterday (Yesterday was my personal study day). I had quite a nice morning. The journey to Rotherham Hospital was smooth, and I was half expecting a rather good day today. But man was I wrong.

I went in, greet Ash, my SHO whom I am shadowing this week. She gave me a patient to see. A kid with rash. Without much hesistation, I went off to see the patient. For whatever reason, I could not find myself to take a good history from the mom. My English was all over the place. My bad day seemed to have started.

Later, I had to examine a guy who apparently has got a lot of interesting clinical signs. I went in, greet him and asked him a few questions whilst examining him. When I presented to Ash my findings, it turned out I missed a very important clinical finding. I forgot to check his tummy which is grossly huge. I felt stupid for missing that out. Later she asked me the signs of clubbing. I knew there are the 5 C's for GI causes of clubbing but could not get all of them. Which is even more frustrating!

Later, I had to see another lady who had a fall. Again she asked me a simple question which I just could not answer. By that time, I was at the end of my wits. I felt ridiculously dumb. I wonder what Ash must have think of me! I am doubting myself now. I understand if she feels the same way about my credibility to become a doctor next year.

Thankfully, there were no more cases in Major. I went in with a Registrar to the Minors and luckily managed to hide myself from the outside world for about 2 hours or so. Or to be more specific, to hide from Ash. Huhu. Oh well, she was the one whom suggested me to go with Dr Raj to the Minors as there were no patients in Major. Perhaps she was the one who can't stand having a thick medical student tagging her along. Huhu.

Argh. I hate this feeling of inadequacy. This must have just been one of those days, isn't it? Hopefully it is!!

Unplanned trip to Brussel

I am going to Brussels this weekend. Yes. This weekend. In the middle of semester. No, its not a holiday. My summer holiday is long gone. Oh well, yes, it is a Bank Holiday this Monday. But it is not as if it is like a proper holiday. But yes, I am going to Brussels with my sister this weekend. I just HAVE to go.

We have just planned it last week when Eza was here in Sheffield. And we just settled our Eurostar ticket and hotel today. And we are going in two days time. And because everything was handled at the eleventh hour, there goes our money down the drain....

As I mentioned earlier, we HAVE to go. Not because the ticket is cheap (heck, it is way the opposite of that). Not because we are dying to go to Brussels. Not because we feel like going for a weekend break in Europe. No. We have to go to Brussels because of my sister's problem with her Visa.

Don't know who is to be blamed for the problem of hers. Someone's plain stupidity and carelessness had almost cause her to pay extra 500 pounds to extend her visa so that she could say in UK legally for just 10 days. Crazy.

Problems after problems have been thrown in her way even before she set her foot in UK. And now she is about to leave UK for good, these problems just keep on coming. MasyaAllah. I wonder how you can cope with those problems, Eza!! Well, I guess what doesn't break you, make you stronger right? Kudos to you beb :)

Well, putting aside the fact that I might need to bring my tutorial to Brussels and also the fact that we will be fasting at that time, I do hope that we will be able to at least have a good time there. Hopefully the trip is worth our money.

Fasting and breaking fast in Brussels. Am quite looking forward to it actually. Hehe.

Salam Ramadhan to all.

Salams.

Ramadhan is here :)

I miss having mama or papa knocking on my door, 15 - 30 minutes before Fajr, waking me up for Sahur.

I miss going to Bazaar Ramadhan with either one of my siblings, bringing back home plastic bags filled with variety of kuih muih, only later to be scolded by mama because we bought a bit too many.

I miss breaking fast with all of the 12 familiar faces (including aqef, adam and the in laws), eating mama's delicious cooking.

I miss rushing to the nearby mosque in our kain sembahyang for tarawikh congregation and rushing back home after completing 8 rakaah of tarawih.

I miss the fun of baking cookies with mama and siblings in the kitchen, especially when I got to be the 'taster' if I am on my 'break'.

I miss the excitement of balik kampung, a few days before Raya.

I miss the joy of celebrating raya with my loved ones back at home.

Sigh. I certainly do miss quite a number of things. I could go on forever and the list will never end! Perhaps I should be thankful with what I have in front of me, instead of complaining and whining over the things that I don't have.

Ramadhan is making me feel a bit homesick. Moreover with all of those people over there, when I am stranded over here. I just can't help but feeling a bit left out.

Oh well, anyway I do hope that this Ramadhan will be better than the previous ones. A sacred month which doesn't come knocking on our door often must never be wasted.

*30 days to go!Oh, looks like I am already starting to counting the days*

Salams

Random

Muni and Atie are gone. It feels so quiet in the house. I guess I just have to get use to this. Thankfully my A&E shifts are keeping me busy, so I did not have the time to whine about the fact that all of my friends are gone.

I am in love with A&E. I don't know why, I just love it. I guess I love it because this is one of the placements where we actually get to do something. Which makes it feels so real. It has not even been a week since I've started A&E in Rotherham, but I had seen plenty of bizzare cases. Nice. Interestingly, it is quite different from Malaysia.

I've learned intubation and suturing. And now I am so keen to actually do it on a real person. Hahahah. Oh yeah, and I am still crazy about cannulating and taking bloods. I guess I will get bored of it once I am an F2 perhaps. Hahah.

This week I have a 10 am to 6 pm shift. Which is not so bad. I am tolerating it well. I just hate the fact that by the time I get home, it is already 7 ish. And the travelling really knocks me down. I will feel too knackered to do anything in the evening, hence, sleep is the only thing that I look forward to at night.

OOOhhh, Izyan has already gave birth to a lovely baby girl today!!! Ohmigod, I can't describe how relief and happy I feel for them both. Can't wait to see you in Ireland!! You are a MUMMY, Izyan! Oh wow. My primary school mate already has a child. Hehe.

OOooh, and Ramadhan is starting this Saturday!!!! Weee. I am excited!! Let this Ramadhan be better than the previous ones.

*Seventeen!!*

Another month. Should I start counting down the days? Hehe

Ok I want some sleep. Adios!